Guidance and Control

If you guide through anything other than your own example, it crosses over into the category of control. If you say, “This is what I’ve found that works for me, try it if you like.” That’s guidance. If you say, “This is what I’ve found works for me, and if you don’t follow it, you’re in trouble,” that’s control.



Abraham-Hicks
November 23, 2018

 

Abraham Hicks has been an inspiration for Wisdom and Life since its inception. The original intent of this blog, to impart positive messages via Law of Attraction shifted after several months to become more spiritual. I’ve never forgotten the roots that became the structure however. I still return frequently to the topics that Abraham Hicks discusses. When I take a quote from one of my inspirations, I typically focus on one or two words in the quote. Today I’m focusing on guidance and control.

Image from:
CJPPhotos

Since discovering Abraham Hicks and Law of Attraction, I like to believe that my personal attitude has shifted from one of control, looking at the world as something to change to make my own world better to one of guidance where I do my best to look inward and see what I must do to change myself. I learned that we can’t change anyone else, we can only change our attitudes and our reactions to outside events. When we change our response to a challenging confrontation and choose not to engage, many times the one causing the conflict loses all reason for continuing. That’s a brief explanation for why I made this significantly similar choice.  Now, the meat of this column.

 

The partial quote:

This is what I’ve found that works for me, try it if you like. is an extension of how I choose to live my life. It’s the entire purpose FOR Wisdom and Life. What works for one person probably won’t work for someone else.  As I’ve maintained here during the course of Wisdom and Life’s existence, helping even just one person with something I’ve written is gratifying enough, because maybe that one person will help someone else due to what they read.

 

Living through a guidance aspect and learning that control can be damaging, not just to the person BEING CONTROLLED, but to the person CONTROLLING as well. It’s the one controlling that hurts more I think. They’re the person that carries that control inside. When you learn to let go and let guidance take over, you’ll find yourself in a better place. All that stress you’re carrying around with you?  That will likely vanish as long as you continue to choose guidance.

 

When you choose control and expect people to follow your lead, many will abandon you. No one likes or even needs control. For the most part, people know what needs to be done. If you simply show them and guide them when they need it, you’ll find that life and work flow so much better. It’s like:

Row your boat DOWN the river.  It’s only when you go against the current that you get in trouble.

 

Let guidance be your life choice.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;
We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

 

 

 

Revisiting The Past

Something a bit different at Wisdom and Life today, and a companion piece to last week’s A Look Back.  We’re traveling back to the beginning of this ride we’ve been on for almost ten years. It’s hard to believe that next May at this time Wisdom and Life will turn ten years old.

 

Image from:
Pixabay

I’ve written many columns over that period. And I hope to continue writing for another ten years. I understand some of my recent readers found me through my adventuring through my NDE. You may have thought that was the entire subject of this site. If you’ve returned at all or explored you’ll see that I write on many topics. I tie everything together in spirituality though. That’s the underlying theme of Wisdom and Life. That and my attempt to show that if you give everything over to spirit and let go of all animosity, you will be able to live a more joyful life.

 

As I’ve written here countless times before, the original intent of Wisdom and Life to concentrate on Law of Attraction (LoA) morphed into a more spiritually themed site about four months after I started. I realized once I understood what happened, that Law of Attraction is just another color of the spiritual rainbow. In other words LoA is another vehicle to realizing faith and spirituality without the dogma attached. For some of us who have strayed from all things religious, regardless of whether they are tied to any specific organized religion or not, simply hearing about spirituality can turn some off.

 

I am deeply spiritual and have always carried a huge amount of faith. I believe that’s why I unconsciously changed the direction of Wisdom and Life. Law of Attraction still plays a role here.  However if you take some time explore, you’ll find I write on a plethora of topics. I will always return to the two main topics when it comes to writing for Wisdom and Life though:
Faith and Spirituality
and
Law of Attraction

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;
We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

A Look Back

Nine years ago, I started writing Wisdom and Life.  So hard to believe it’s been nine years since this blog has existed.  

Image from:
Pexels.com

Thought it would be fun to read my initial post from May 30, 2010:
Starting another blog today. After hearing some of my story a few weeks ago, my friend, Mary thought others might benefit from some of my wisdom. (Ha-ha) We’ll see how this goes.

This will be a place to share my thoughts on life and why I think we’re here. Feel free to comment on my posts. I’d like to get as many perspectives as possible here. Will try and post something between twice a week to daily. We’ll see how it goes.

To start with:

Let me introduce myself. For those of you who don’t know me from my photography blog, I’m a photographer who lives in Madison, Connecticut who just happens to have changed his perspective on life a couple years ago. What happened, you may ask?

The Secret is what happened. I’ve moved on from that initial introduction. One way I describe The Secret is think of it as AOL in the early days of the Internet. America Online was the introduction to many to the online world. Once you became familiar with the Internet through AOL some graduated to direct Internet. So think of The Secret in the same manner. It is simply a bridge to move forward to greater wisdom.

Follow me and we will see where this life brings us!

We’ll see you again soon!

Chris

 

Walking In Someone Else’s Shoes

During my recent time in the hospital, I reconnected with an old friend from high school. Shawn visited just about every day. We reminisced about our time in high school. He remembered the times when I was belittled and sometimes bullied because of some of my challenges, from my speech that sometimes prevented me from getting the words out that I wanted to say to my appearance because of my scoliosis. Shawn wondered how I let that roll off my back and continued to smile through everything.

I explained to him my reasoning behind my personality.

Just think about what must be happening in THEIR lives, I said. They must have been bullied themselves, either at home or in school. I never took anything anyone did or said to me personally. I did my best and still do my best to see bullying and belittlement from another perspective. I put myself in their shoes. I feel bad for them, because just think about all that negative energy they carry around with them. It has to be released in some way. And unfortunately, many of us don’t have a constructive way to do so. To my advantage, I found my creative outlet.

 

I spent my nights after dinner while in school writing. That became my outlet. It was how I released my own negative energy. And it worked for me. If I hadn’t had that, who knows?  I don’t think I’d have ever become a bully having experienced it myself all through grammar school and high school to a degree. I always had too much empathy to to consider belittling anyone.

 

I found it fascinating to talk to Shawn again after all the years that passed between us. He seemed to recall more examples of my being intimidated while in high school. Sometimes others see something happening when we don’t. I KNOW there were definitely times when I felt belittled, however I always felt more distress for those doing the intimidating. I kept thinking about their lives. What must they be going through?

 

That probably won’t work in today’s socially connected world where a single thought or post can be seen by your entire tribe, your friends, your frenemies and anyone else. I was also fortunate to have friends such as Shawn.

 

Jack Whaley was another such friend I made the first day in the eighth grade. People who took the time to get to know me beyond my outward challenges. I’m grateful for all my friends. But of all my high school friends, having Shawn visit me while I spent so much time in the hospital this winter really touched me. Listening to him relate some stories about his experience with seeing me be intimidated rocked my world because in some cases I don’t recall it happening. But once he’d leave, I would reflect on it and then I’d remember. Oh yeah, I’d think. That DID occur.

 

Bullying has taken on an entirely new dimension and we can no longer just turn to our friends to help and we can’t simply put ourselves in the bully’s shoes. There’s too much of it happening today.  The connected world has made life easier and more challenging at the same time. It’s sad that people still feel the need to intimidate others. I still can’t help but think about the lives they have.  

 

Being empathetic is who I am.  And it’s how I made it through my school age years. Maybe if more people looked at life that way we wouldn’t have so much ugly threatening. Am I being too naive?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;
We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Memorial Day 2019

A repeat performance!

As today is Memorial Day my usual column will be postponed.  Memorial Day should be a day of remembrance.  When you see someone in the US Military this week, make sure you thank them for their service.

 

Image from:
CJP Photos
4thMadisonMilitary005

 

And PLEASE remember, Memorial Day is more than the unofficial start of summer.  It is more than just another day off.  It is more than picnics and sales.

 

Memorial Day is designated as the National day of Remembrance.  It is the day we pause and give thanks to all those who lost their lives in our conflicts and wars throughout our history.

 

Passing Into The Next Life

Passing into the next life has never been a traumatic expectation for me, especially after having my own NDE. Since becoming familiar with past lives and learning from each life we live, I’ve also realized that we choose the life we live and even how and when we return to our true home. The ethereal, the spiritual realm is our true home. It’s why I have no fear of passing on. And the fact that I’ve already been to the other side leaves me feeling more at peace.

 

Image from:
Pixabay

 

If, as I believe we DO CHOOSE how and when we will pass into the next realm, those left behind have to create a new mindset.  We have to learn to celebrate the life that left us. There should be no need to feel anything but joy. I certainly understand why we mourn those who have passed. We feel as if they are no longer with us; especially if they were taken violently or unexpectedly. That makes it understandable why we feel distressed when someone we care for deeply passes on.  We’ve forgotten that we have chosen the path we take in this human life.

 

In other words, we’ve already mapped out how we will return to the ethereal.  Whether it is unexpected, or something we are aware of as illness overtakes us makes no difference.  We’ve decided ourselves in transition hall when we return to spirit.

 

Violent death can be especially challenging to overcome.  It’s difficult for those left to pick up the pieces after a sudden passing, especially one that was totally unexpected.  We have to realize that getting angry about a sudden death does no one any good. Remember my column:

Holding onto Anger?  In that column I wrote:
When you hold on it’s like grasping a hot piece of coal.  You only wind up hurting yourself.  

 

I understand this topic may ruffle some feathers.  It may seem somewhat esoteric to my readers. I realize that IF we DO choose when and how we leave this physical plane and THEN once we become human again we forget everything we did in Transition Station (To learn more about this see Soul Groups.) I can see how punishment, retribution and anger could certainly overwhelm us.  The thing we have to remember though is the fact that we forget everything when we incarnate again.  

 

The reason we forget is because we wouldn’t learn anything from the last life we just led.  The entire reason for reincarnation is to learn from each life and attempt to improve and learn from past transgressions.  We want to get to a place where we don’t have to return. We want to seek perfection. Not that we will ever get there, but we want to get to a point where we’ve learned enough and made enough positive changes so we can get off the reincarnation ride, where we can eventually choose to return if we want to.  So you may be asking where this worldview I have came from.

 

This belief that we choose how we come and go in this world primarily evolved through a book called Journey of Souls.  Feel free to click the preceding link to read more about the book at my blog.  If you go back and read my column called:
Signing a Contract you will see more of this belief system there. I also recommend reading my thoughts on how we choose our next life in Soul Groups. Start with:
For it is in our humanity that we are tested.  And we don’t know our results until we are all together again in Transition Station.  Notice we go through Transition Tunnel to get to Transition Station?

 

Another piece of my worldview puzzle fell into place through a Melissa Etheridge  song called:

Gently We Row.  In that song, there’s a lyric she sings:
My soul crashed into my body
Falling into consciousness

 

This is exactly how I see our spiritual souls coming from the ethereal realm, The Transition Station where we choose our next life.  Apparently, Melissa Etheridge feels the same way.

 

I understand why people feel angry when someone close to them passes on violently but if as I believe we choose how we will return AND how we will pass, IF WE ALL choose how we return then we have to celebrate the life and not mourn the passing or be angry about how the person went home. The unfortunate thing as I said earlier in today’s column, is that when we DO pass into the ethereal, we forget the choice we made and even that we made the choice at all.

 

That’s why writing this blog and specifically my thoughts on death and dying as well as the topic of past lives is so important to understand.  If more of us considered the fact that this MAY be true, that we DO all return again and again and that we DO choose how and when we leave and return:
I believe we would stop being so distressed over death.  
I believe we would become a kinder gentler people.  
I believe criminal punishment would take on a whole new meaning.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

Arthur C. Clarke’s Third Law and Star Trek Discovery

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from. magic.
Captain Pike from Discovery says:
The law was debated by scientists and theologians alike and later reinterpreted to say any sufficiently advanced extraterrestrial intelligence is indistinguishable from God.

Star Trek Discovery
New Eden

 

I’m stepping outside my usual themes today, using Star Trek as my inspiration today.  As you read today’s column, you’ll find that I do link everything back to my spirituality theme.  I wrote this column in January.  However, as events occurred since then, such as my NDE and my three hospital stays, I’ve had to move columns around.

 

As I’ve written at Wisdom and Life multime times over, I’m a HUGE fan of Star Trek.  You can read my previous columns by clicking on the preceding link.  Star Trek Discovery is the new series based on the original. The second season started a few weeks ago and New Eden is the second episode of the second season.  Not only am I fan of Star Trek, I’m a fan of science fiction (SF) in general.

 

Arthur C.Clarke is a one of the quintessential SF writers of the 20th century.

 

Image from:
Wikimedia

Prins Claus en Arthur C Clarke (1982)


Hearing Captain Pike from Discovery, reinterpret Clarke’s third law to include God stirred my thoughts.  The overriding subject of Wisdom and Life IS spirituality and finding a better way to live your life.  My faith in God has helped me live a better life. Getting back to Star Trek, in a Next Generation episode called The Chase, Captain Picard discovers a theory that humanity may have been seeded from the stars, which returns us to the quote that Captain Pike reinterpreted.  There’s no reason proof of extraterrestrial intelligence has to nullify a belief in God, which leads DIRECTLY back to Pike’s interpretation of Clarke’s Third Law

 

Everything is a circle and everything repeats itself over and over.

 

If we believe that God is omnipotent, why couldn’t he have created more than one race?  I’ve discussed this previously here but can’t recall the exact column.

 

Since I mentioned Next Generation earlier in this column, I liked seeing that Jonathan Frakes directed this episode.  I hope by having a name from a previous Trek direct Discovery shows that there is interest in seeing the latest Star Trek succeed. Also there’s the fact that Patrick Stewart is returning to the role of Captain Picard. Seeing all these events line up leads me to believe that Star Trek will indeed “live long and prosper.”

 

I’m enjoying the new series and seeing spirituality enter Discovery makes the new Star Trek more appealing, at least to me.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Why Are So Quiet/Talk To Me

I touched on this topic a while ago with Silence Is Golden. I wanted to return to it again today. Of all the questions I regularly receive, the one that most distresses me is:
Why are you so quiet?
Followed by
Talk to me.

Generally these two sentences come from people who know me well and they are aware of my personality. I think that’s why I get agitated each time I’m asked this. Most of the time they want to engage in small talk. A few of them are uncomfortable with silence. They feel like maybe the person not talking is angry. In my case as with many introverts, small talk is cringeworthy. We’d rather stay quiet then engage if there is nothing fulfilling to discuss.

 

 

 

Ask me about my passions and I won’t shut up.
Ask me about the latest book I’m reading.
Ask me where I last took my camera.
Ask me what I’m writing.

 

Get me to engage about what makes me tick, then you’ll be wishing for blessed silence.
Introverts are only quiet when someone tries engage them in small talk.
Introverts are only quiet when they need time to recharge.
Introverts are only quiet when they are sizing up a new possible friend.

 

I don’t know if it’s an introvert trait. I’ve never asked other introverts. As for me, I can generally tell within ten minutes of meeting someone for the first time what kind of relationship we will have going forward.
If we’re just going to pass through for a temporary time.
If we’re going to stay in touch occasionally
OR
If we’re going to be bonded for life.

 

My radar for determining how a relationship will come to pass has been pretty spot on. Can another introvert let me know whether they’re radar works the same way? Can my fellow introverts determine fairly quickly what kind of relationship they will have after a short time?

 

If the people in my life would only understand how I feel when they attempt to engage me in small talk and stop asking me why I’m so quiet, I’d be in a better position to engage.

 

Am I the only one?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;
We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

The Color Blue

As I started to get ready for work one day in February, I grabbed a sweater.  I then started going through all the sweaters I own and realized how much I am drawn to the color blue.  Over three quarters of the sweaters I own are different shades of that color. Once that became apparent, I saw how much blue is in my life:

 

Image from:
Wikipedia

My bedroom curtains
My iPhone case
My computer cover
My two water bottles

My portable bluetooth speaker
Two of my winter jackets
Many sweaters/sweatshirts are some shade of blue.

 

And here’s the funny thing about that:
My conscious color choice is burgundy.  

 

However, it’s the unconscious choice that I believe is more important.  For that’s the choice I believe that reflects who I truly am, because I chose it without any knowledge of why I chose it.  As I look back at all the color blue that surrounds me I am truly in awe.  

 

Unconsciously, my color of choice is blue.  I had no idea how much the color blue has influenced my life.  Once i saw this, I started ruminating on how color influences our lives and what each color means to us.  What our favorite color, the color we choose either, consciously, or unconsciously, says about us:
If blue is your favorite color you love harmony, are reliable, sensitive and always make an effort to think of others.  You like to keep things clean and tidy and feel that stability is the most important aspect in life.

From:
Psychology Today

 

Many of these traits line up with my Introversion/INFP personality:

Sensitivity and thinking of others before yourself are certainly traits I have and they correlate well with  the INFP personality type.

 

If you look at the first two traits under INFP Strengths on this page that describes INFPs you’ll clearly see this is correct:
INFP Relationships

 

I found fascinating information about how the color I chose rather unconsciously matches up with my introvert personality.  I wonder how many other people are choosing colors unaware of their choice and what it says about their own personalities.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Easter Monday

As is always the case, when my blog falls on a holiday, I interrupt my regularly scheduled routine and write about that specific holiday.  Since yesterday was Easter Sunday and by some semblance, today is Easter Monday it is time again to write about this holy day:

 

Image from:
Pixabay

 

Easter is important to a wide range of people.  Myself included. Even though I don’t consider myself religious, that doesn’t mean I don’t practice my own faith.  Faith is what helped me survive through all the challenges I’ve faced in this my latest incarnation.

 

I do believe in the resurrection.  I do believe I’m still a practicing Christian. I just may have taken a detour on the path.

 

Christianity, Spirituality can work together.  There are many themes within Christianity that are anathema to my own belief system, such as the view of past lives and reincarnation.  I understand that there are those in the strict Christian model that find some of my worldview counter to their belief system. That’s alright.

 

I’ve been able to meld all of my worldview into my own practice.  That works for me.
The resurrection?
God?
Jesus?
Easter?

 

I have no issue fitting opposing viewpoints into my own puzzle.  Easter and the Resurrection has always been and will continue to be an important aspect of my spiritual practice.

 

I do believe and will ALWAYS believe!

 

Be Happy!  Be Well! Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.