Your Happiness Depends On You

Tell everyone you know: “My happiness depends on me, so you’re off the hook.” And then demonstrate it. Be happy, no matter what they’re doing. Practice feeling good, no matter what. And before you know it, you will not give anyone else responsibility for the way you feel — and then, you’ll love them all. Because the only reason you don’t love them, is because you’re using them as your excuse to not feel good.

 

Abraham Hicks

 

This has been a process.  Taken me many years to comprehend and as with all processes, it is a constant challenge to stay on course.  I run into the wall, however as I’m fond of saying at Wisdom and Life, I’m now more adept at seeing that wall and sometimes, more times than not now, I’m able to walk around the wall.  In the end, Abraham Hicks is correct:
No one can MAKE you feel anything that you don’t allow in.
Smiley

 

When one first starts to change their worldview,
When one first decides to stop letting someone or something affect their vibration, they can struggle because it is new to them.  They won’t know the steps.  They will feel they are doing something wrong.

 

Stop!
You’re NOT doing ANYTHING wrong.  Don’t let that emotional storm in your gut determine what you’re doing is right or wrong.  Your happiness is what’s important.  Don’t let someone or something else determine how you feel.  When someone lashes out at you for something, many times, they are projecting.  It’s something in them that they are dealing with.  If you can realize this, if you can move beyond the hurt they caused and understand that THEY MUST be hurting too, if you can feel empathy instead of anger, if you can reach out in caring and not in reciprocal hurt your life will change.  You’ll no longer carry that anger inside.  You’ll only feel love and peace.

 

That’s a much better way to feel.  Don’t you think?

 

It’s a process.  However, I’d rather be moving in the direction of feeling positive.
Wouldn’t you?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Roadmap To The Future

How do you find your future?  It’s as I wrote at Wisdom and Life in April, 2013 with:
The Imagination Process.
You first have to imagine your life as you wish it to be.  The road map to your future is created in your imagination.

 

Image from:
Wikimedia
Road Map

Without a road map to guide you, you’re lost when you travel to a new location.  Your future will ALWAYS be a new location because you don’t know where it is.  That’s where your imagination comes into play.  If you could have anything you want, if you could do anything you want and there were no restrictions, what would you do?

Imagine yourself up on a stage singing.
Imagine yourself in front of a camera acting.
Imagine yourself in front of an easel painting a wooded scene.

 

Whatever it is that you desire, keep your mind’s eye on that prize.  Focus on your want.  Never stop thinking about that prize.  I’m reminded of Einstein’s quote about imagination:
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.

 

Without imagination, nothing that now exists would exist at all.  Imagination is power.  Many truly know what they want.  But they don’t understand that you first have to imagine your success.

 

That’s what I’m doing now.  EVERY waking moment and who knows, probably EVERY sleeping moment, the ONLY thing I keep seeing is myself at my local bookstore signing copies of my soon to be published book.  (Another thing I’m imagining.)  I close my mind’s eye and can see lines down the street and a crowded standing room only area of my local bookstore, listening to me speak about my book.

 

Some may say, but Chris this is just a pipe dream.  To them, I smile.  Thinking:
Just wait.  I’m determined to make this happen.  Just like I was determined to get the job at my local library.  If you recall (those of you who have been following Wisdom and Life since its inception) I had people ask me what I was going to do with a Library Science degree when I returned to school.  My response?
I’m going to get hired at The Scranton Library in Madison.

 

No one believed it.  Well that’s where I’m working now.  It’s all imagination and determination.

 

It starts with imagining your success first.  However imagination can only get you so far.  You have to continue focusing on that imagination.  You have to follow that road map.  Nothing will happen unless you are determined to follow your imagination.  Don’t let anyone divert you.  If you truly know what you want, if you truly love what you are doing, then follow that bliss.  Follow that road map.  Keep chasing your imagination.

 

What are you imagining?

 

Remember:
Your imagination is your road map to your future!

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

August 17

Today is a bittersweet day:
August 17 will always be a difficult day for me.

 

It is three days before my birthday.  That’s not why the 17th is so challenging for me however.  It is because it is the day my paternal grandmother passed (my Nana.)  It will resonate clearly for me until we meet again.

 

My Dad found his mother and what made it even more emotional for me is that she still held a birthday card in her hand for me.  I was three days short of being 8 years old.  My Dad had been gone from Connecticut for over four years and my Nana was the last connection I had to him.  So when she passed, it was tremendously difficult for me.  I think that’s when I came to rely on my maternal grandparents more and I believe that’s when my grandfather REALLY stepped up.

 

A birthday should be something to celebrate.  However, with my Nana transitioning so close to my birthday, it has always been a bittersweet day for me.

 

Anyone who has been following Wisdom and Life for any time should realize my thought patterns tend to the esoteric.  I’m always looking for connections.  I’m always watching out for how people and events relate to each other.  So here’s what I think, esoteric as it may be in someone else’s eyes, it is what I see:
You understand how deeply I connect with predestination and you understand that I see connections everywhere, right?  So let me draw you a picture.  Let me connect the dots as I see them:
My Aunt Bet, my Fairy Godmother is my Nana.

 

Aunt Bet became my surrogate Nana.  Why do I see that?

It is because Aunt Bet took care of me just as my Nana did.  I see another connection between my Nana and Aunt Bet in the fact that Aunt Bet was my stepdad’s aunt and my Nana was my dad’s mother.

 

And speaking of predestination, I can clearly believe that before I incarnated into this my most recent incarnation, it was planned by my Nana and Aunt Bet that they would each play a monumental role in my life.  My Nana for the first eight years when I needed to maintain a connection to my biological Dad.  And Aunt Bet later in life when I needed her love and support.

 

As I’ve maintained for as long as I’ve been incarnated now, my life has been full of emotional and physical challenges; however I’ve had a HUGE support team, from friends to family I could turn to when I needed them.  I could very well have gone down another road, followed a different path.  I could have become a very angry person.  I could have become very negative and no one would have blinked.  No one would have thought twice.  But I’d seen people with similar experiences take that path.  I wasn’t raised that way.  I count myself fortunate to have had such wonderful people in my life:
My Mom.
My Maternal Grandparents.
My Nana.
My Aunt Bet.

 

I miss my grandparents!
I miss my Nana!
I miss my Aunt Bet.

 

My Nana is always close to my thoughts, but ESPECIALLY in August because three days before my birthday is always emotionally distressing for me.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

All Is Truly Well

If you know that all is well, you know all you need to know. And if you know life is supposed to be fun, you know more than almost anybody else knows. And if you know that the way you feel is your indicator of how connected you are to Source, then you know that which only a handful of Deliberate Creators, respective to the total population, really know. The beasts all know it. Your animals know that all is well. Your animals live in the moment. They understand the power of their now. They expect the Universe to yield to them. They don’t worry or fret or conjure or make laws or rules or try to regulate. They are Pure Positive Energy. Your beasts vibrate more on the Energy scale of contentment than of passion. Their desire was set forth from Nonphysical, and continues to be set forth by those, like you, who want Energy balance, who want sustenance. The difference between the beast and the human is that the beast is more general in its intent. The human is usually less blended, usually less allowing of the Energy to flow, but is more specific. And that is why the human is seen to be the Creator while the beast is more the balancer of Energy.

 

Abraham Hicks

 

How often do you feel content?
How often do feel connected?

Image from:
Wikimedia

PluggedIn

 

 

What is source?
What does it mean to be connected?

 

If you look at source as the universal power for good, as the power of positive energy then you can clearly see that being connected means being plugged into that energy source.  That source, for me is simply another way of defining the Divine.  It’s just another way of defining God; which is why I’ve always maintained that Law of Attraction (LoA) has served to deepen my faith.  Law of Attraction is so much more than asking for THINGS.  It is so much more than bringing THINGS into your life.

Law of Attraction is a means to an end.
Law of Attraction is a philosophy.
Law of Attraction is a way to live your life.

 

Re-read the above statement from Abraham Hicks and you’ll begin to understand the philosophy behind LoA.  LoA tells us that we can change our thoughts and when we change our thoughts, our entire well-being changes, our well-being will improve.  Simply look at the first line:
If you know that all is well, you know all you need to know.

 

Those of us who are truly steeped in this paradigm understand that all IS well and all will ALWAYS be well.  Even when challenges arise, after they dissipate, we can always find a blessing.  Those of us who know where to look will always find that opened window after a door closes.  That window ALWAYS opens.  Sometimes we have look harder for it.  When you are connected to source, this all becomes rote.

 

Knowing that all is well becomes routine.
Knowing that you will be provided for becomes routine.  It’s just like I said at my column at Wisdom and Life called:
Two Symptoms of Enlightenment:
When we become spiritually enlightened, we lose all our fears, we lose our worry.

 

Where does fear and worry originate from?  Why do we worry?

We worry and fear when we look to the future, correct?
We worry and fear when we don’t know what’s around the next corner.

 

So how do we stop that worry?  How do we halt it in its tracks?
Anyone?

 

Let’s go back a couple of lines here and look at what causes worry:
when we look to the future.

 

So the solution is as Eckhart Tolle says in his quintessential book:
The Power of Now:
Stay in the present moment.

 

That’s how to stay connected to source.
That’s how to feel content.
That’s how to know that all is truly well.

 

How many of us can practice this on a regular basis?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Stay In Your Vibration

Because others cannot vibrate in your experience, they cannot affect the outcome of your experience. They can hold their opinions, but unless their opinion affects your opinion, their opinion matters not at all. A million people could be pushing against you, and it would not negatively affect you unless you push back. They are affecting what happens in their experience. They are affecting their point of attraction—but it does not affect you unless you push against them.

 

Abraham Hicks

 

I’m usually very adept at putting Abraham Hicks motivations into action for myself.  However we all have places where we can improve.  My own is in this realm.  While I understand intellectually that we all vibrate at different levels and in order for something or someone does to get through we have to lower our vibration to their place, it is easier said than done for me to stay at a higher vibration when influenced by negativity.  This is something I constantly need to work on, something I constantly need to improve about myself.  Last week, I mentioned about being sensitive sometimes to my detriment. This is where that thought continually crops up from.  Do I let circumstances and hurt affect me in a way that is harmful to my own psyche?  I know when someone says something or does something hurtful to me, I tend to let it fester.  I used to not stand up and say:
No.  I’m an adult now and I don’t expect to be treated like a child anymore.  This is NOT going to happen anymore.

 

Image from:
Pixabay
vibration

I’ve become strong enough now emotionally that I CAN stand up and say this.  My heart still flutters when I stand up for myself, but I understand that unless I say something, the negativity will continue eating its way through me.  And the situation won’t get any better because it won’t change.  Most of the time I simply walk away and that feels better too.  That way I’m not feeding the negative energy.  I’m not giving it what it needs.  I like the part of the above statement:
They are affecting what happens in their experience. They are affecting their point of attraction.

 

I see that as truth.  And I also understand that what happens within the person who throws out negativity is hurt and angry themselves and they have to rid themselves of that negative energy.  They haven’t yet reached a place in their lives where they understand that they are only hurting themselves in the long run.

 

See how smart I am now?  Well after the fact, well after the outburst I can clearly see the challenges.  But when someone is in the moment of emotional negativity, it is a COMPLETELY different situation.  What we have to do however, is when we are in that moment, remember everything we know about why this is happening.  If we can do that, we can remain in that higher vibrational plane.  We are safer there; those of us who have reached that place.  How do you feel?  Those of you at that higher vibration?

–Happy?
–Positive?

 

Isn’t that where you want to stay?  Isn’t that where you want to bring everyone who is in turmoil?  The best way to show people the way is NOT to let the negativity in.

 

The next time someone does or says something hurtful, smile at them.  Give them a hug.  And stand back and watch their reaction.  I bet they won’t know what to do.  Stay at your high vibration.  Don’t come down to theirs.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

You Can’t Go Back

Can a place really mold who you are?  I believe so.  So much of who I am is because of the time I spent in Lisbon, Connecticut.  I’ve been thinking recently about my time growing up in Lisbon, Connecticut on Graham Terrace, probably because my Bestest has been mentioning how fortunate I was to have had that experience.
ArrowQuestion

I’ve written here many times about growing up in Lisbon.  It was my safe place, my security zone.  My best friend lived around the corner, there was that ubiquitous fishing hole down the street, my maternal grandparents (especially, my grandfather) made a huge impact on my life.  My grandfather was the male role model I experienced growing up.  As I may have mentioned here previously, my grandfather taught me to fish.  He gave me me my photography obsession, buying me my first camera for my tenth birthday.  He was my confidant.  He taught me to respect people and be sensitive to others, putting others first.

 

The time I spent in Lisbon became so special that after I graduated from high school, I returned to attend college there for two years.  I didn’t have the same experience and I now understand why.  It’s because as I tell my Bestest all the time:
Life is about moving forward, not going back.  You can’t go back!

 

My grandfather was a sensitive soul, very emotional, very loving, quick to forgive, and extremely demonstrative.  I learned all of these traits from him.  You know that old saying:
Children learn what they live.

 

Because my grandfather was the primary male role model in my life, I naturally absorbed his personality.  Like him, I’m quick to forgive.  I’m extremely sensitive.  Sometimes I wonder if I’m too sensitive, if I take the emotional hurt I receive too deeply.  I know, however that it’s who I am and I’m comfortable with it.  I can’t change who I am and I wouldn’t want to.

–I CAN take the hurt I receive a little too deeply.
— I’m more aware of others and I feel their pain more than I feel my own.
–I’m more empathic than many of my friends.
–I have a greater feeling for what may happen in the future.

 

I’m very demonstrative, loving, quick to hug someone if they need it, quick to show my emotions.  Sometimes, maybe too quick to become emotional, sometimes maybe to my detriment.  However, as I said above, I can’t change that about myself.  Nor would I want to.

 

My Bestest has told me countless times how fortunate I am to have had my grandfather in my life.  She has said he did an amazing job helping me become the person I am.  She should know seeing as I spend so much time with her.  I wish sometimes now that I’m writing this column that she would have come into my life sooner so my maternal grandparents could have known her as I do.  I think they would become fast friends as I have done with her.  I’ve been so fortunate in my life to have had so many good people come into my experience:
My maternal grandparents.
My Aunt Bet, My Fairy Godmother.  

See now?  Aunt Bet would have been someone else I would dearly have loved for my Bestest to have met.  Because my Maternal Grandparents and my Aunt Bet played such significant roles in my life I would have loved for them to have met each other.  They each made such a huge impact on my life I’d love to see them all interact with each other.  I’d love to be a fly on the wall listening to their conversations.

 

My best friend, Joe in Lisbon while growing up.
My friends, Jason, Julie and Tim.
My Bestest now.

 

I miss my grandparents more now than I have in the past, only because I’ve been thinking more about them, because when I’m with my Bestest I can’t help but think about what it would be like if they had met.  Oh, the stories they could have told each other:

My grandparents regaling her with the distant past.
Her telling my grandparents how much they influenced me growing up.  I can almost close my eyes and hear the stories going back and forth.

 

However, I should be grateful (and I am) that I’ve been able to have so many good people in my life.  And I understand that people come and go into our lives for specific reasons:
My friend, Jason came along when my friend, Joe left.  A door closed (Joe) and a window opened (Jason.)

 

I see these things more clearly now that I’m in this paradigm.  I understand this isn’t possible but it is nice to fantasize about.  Do you have someone important in your own life that you wish you have met family who have since transitioned?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Imaginary Friends

This story from

Calvin and Hobbes:
The way we see Calvin and Hobbes brought back a memory of my imaginary friend.

 

Image from:
Flickr
Calvin.Hobbes

We all have imaginary friends growing up.  Mine was Jim.  He was my friend in real life as well.  Living with my grandparents at 18 Graham Terrace in Lisbon, Connecticut as I’ve said here before couldn’t have provided  me with a better childhood.  My maternal grandparents were amazing people and they will always have a special place in my life.

 

Jim lived next door to me for awhile on Blissville RD in Lisbon.  I recall one particular morning when I stayed with my grandparents, My grandfather came into the kitchen and sat in his customary chair to start eating breakfast, I cried out:
Get up, Gramp!
Get up!

 

He looked at me quizzically and I said:
You’re sitting on Jimmy.

 

My grandmother turned to see what the commotion was and when she saw my grandfather sitting at his usual spot, she laughed and said don’t you know Jimmy sits there, Hoffy?  That’s what she called my grandfather,  short for Hoffman, his last name.  Everyone called him Hoffy.

 

Who were your imaginary friends?

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Give Your Children Wings

Parents can’t choose the mates of their children or the behavior of their children. You actually can’t choose anything for your children without disempowering them.

 

Abraham-Hicks

 

Your family of origin, your genetic family ALWAYS has the best of intentions for you when they attempt to guide you.  However, more often than not their guidance pulls you away from your heart, from your true reason for incarnating.  Your genetic family has to learn to let go.  They have to let you do what is best for you.  As I’ve maintained here at Wisdom and Life from this blog’s inception:
EVERYONE eventually finds their way if you let them be.

 

Image from:
Pixabay
wings

 

Look it at this way:
What if someone attempted to tell you as an adult what they think you should be doing and pushed you in a direction you knew wasn’t right for you?

 

What if someone told you No!  You can’t be with him or her when you were of an age where you could clearly decide for yourself?

 

Now I understand that children need guidance.  I’m not condoning letting them run wild.  What I am saying is this:
Give them the freedom they need to make their own way.  If they have a desire to pursue something that you feel is a mistake, stand back and let them go.  And remember:
Sometimes, you may be influencing your child to do something for financial gain because you’re concerned for their future.  My belief is just the opposite.  You should be influencing your children to be happy, to be joyful.

 

Isn’t it more appropriate to love what you’re doing and make a little less money than be making money hand over fist and be miserable?  And missing out on all life has to offer?

 

Disempower
What a powerful word to use here.  By attempting to choose the life for your children, that’s EXACTLY what you are doing:
Disempowering them.

 

Children need to learn from their challenges and by not letting them make errors in judgement, by shielding them, you are in the end doing them a disservice.  And they know better than you do what they want to do.  If they are brought up in a family where they feel intimidated to speak their mind, they won’t.  And they will wind up letting someone else make their decisions for them, thus disempowering them yet again.  Parents need to step away and let their children fly.  It’s truly the only way our children will make their way in the world.

 

If you attempt to tell your children who they can be intimate with and who they can’t, you’ll also run the same risk of alienating them.  Is that what you really want?  Love happens in many ways and takes many forms.  You can no more tell someone who to love than you can tell them what career to choose.

 

Maybe someone who attempts to guide their children is REALLY trying to live vicariously.  In other words, perhaps what the parents are guiding their children toward is something they themselves wanted to do when they were young.  The cycle has to break somewhere, otherwise children and adults will continually be unhappy.

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

Freedom

Seeing as July is ubiquitous with the word freedom in The United States, I’d like to take a few minutes to discuss the word and what it means to me:
Freedom means different things to different people.
Freedom from oppression
Freedom from pain, emotional as well as physical.
Freedom to choose your own priorities.

 

Dictionary.com defines freedom as:
exemption from external control, interference, regulation, etc.

 

The United States, The U.S. Flag and the word freedom generally go hand in hand

Image from:
CJP Photos
USFlag

 

For myself:
Freedom is being able to choose the way I WANT to live my life.
Freedom is being free from negativity.

Freedom is finding joy where I am at the present moment and doing my best to stay in the present moment.

 

 

What is freedom to you?

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.

 

Are You Plugged In?

While dreaming of a better future today, you may also notice that you feel hopeful. This is a positive sign that you realize these are not mere flights of fancy but plans in the making. Once you can imagine even a few of the infinite possibilities, you may feel encouraged that they seem more within reach than you might have previously thought. Whether or not you have a vision of each and every step to get you to your goal, you can still feel buoyant as you do your best to steer your course while trusting yourself to the tides of the universe today.

 

The DailyOM (Leo)Horoscope
Monday, June 15, 2015

 

Your intuition is ALWAYS working beneath the surface, whether you realize it or not.  When you’re plugged in, when you feel joy, when you know you’re on the right path, your intuition will tell you. Feeling hopeful is a clear sign that you are doing what you’re supposed to be doing.

 

Image from:
Wikimedia
PluggedIn

 

Listen to that bliss.
And listen FOR that bliss.

When you’re plugged in, time will appear to speed up and slow down at the same time.  Time will appear not to exist.  Do you understand why that is?  It is as I said in the column:
Time Doesn’t Exist at Wisdom and Life.

 

It’s because when you’re plugged in, you are tapping into the Divine.  Because you are using the gifts that you incarnated with and when you tap into the spiritual realm, the Divine, there is no need for clocks.  There is no need for time.  You know when you’re tapped in because you get into flow.

 

You should ALWAYS dream of a better future.  Never stay still.  Always be reaching for something greater than you have at the present moment.  That’s how we stay in hope.  For without hope, why go on?

 

It’s why my ambition never falters.
It’s why I’m continually seeking to improve.
Hope is what moves me forward.
Faith is what gets me there.

 

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

 

Once you realize that life is eternal,
That our souls our eternal,
That we return to light and physical over and over;

 

We then lose all our distress
We then lose all our fear of dying.  For there truly is no end.